Wednesday, October 10, 2012
It doesn’t matter if you are a mom or a dad; making time for yourself is the key to parenting sanity.
I don’t consider myself a martyr, but when I admitted to friends that I hadn’t been away from my kids overnight in years, I began to rethink things. The weekly all nighters, the hourly feedings and the screaming fits are over. Well, to be honest, the screaming fits still happen—just not at four in the morning because of diaper rash. So doesn’t that mean that taking time for myself should be easier? Maybe the problem isn’t the kids; maybe the problem is me. Well, that’s a load off my shoulders. I thought my kids were dragging me down. It turns out I am dragging myself down. I am the one who stays home with the kids so my husband can go on four (yes four) boys' weekends in one summer. I am the one who makes sure the soccer and ballet …
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
When is the right time to teach kids about stranger danger, and how much do they need to know?
I pride myself in being a very well informed and in touch parent. But, just as my daughter’s first sleepover request snuck up on me, so did the realities of stranger danger. I did the basic "stay away from strangers" talk, role-played common abduction scenarios and how to yell "fire" and not "help," reminded them never to leave my side and harped on who is OK to talk to and who isn’t. But when the outside world comes close to home, my talks suddenly seemed inadequate. My small town is struggling with and debating over what to do when a Level 3 sex offender made his presence known to children hanging out downtown, playing soccer and biking to school. While he has not committed a crime in our town to date (he is from a neighboring town), his…
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
The urban legend of the easy baby is just that, and I am here to put it to bed.
Believe it or not, I have a friend who once claimed, “I am bored at home because raising this baby is so easy. My baby is easy!” Of course, every set of eyes at the dinner tabled rolled with contempt as our friend blathered on about life with an easy baby. She coos all day, she goes to sleep without any fuss and her poops smell like roses. Blah, blah, blah. None of us bought it for one moment, and while I wanted to press her for the real deal, I let it go. If she believed her baby was easy then what was wrong with that? For starters, it makes the rest of us feel like inadequate, unappreciative underachievers. And I was not having it. Therefore, I have decided that there are no “easy babies." There are only degrees of difficulty that do not…
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
When is it OK to mix the business of parenting with the pleasure of a glass of wine?
It’s about time I write something to stir up the comment section. I usually stick to the less controversial issues and leave the hardcore topics to the more tough of skin. But I am done dodging the age-old question of whether or not it is OK to drink at kid’s birthday parties and play dates. I am here to say that (for me, anyway) it is OK. Now I am not talking about binge parties and keggers. I am talking about hosts supplying some beers and some wine at their child’s birthday party or offering a glass of wine during a play date. A lot has been written about this dilemma in the past few years, and there have even been books to address or mock the parenting quandary like "Nap Time Is The New Happy Hour" by Stephanie Wilder-Taylor and "The …
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Sleepovers are a rite of passage for kids and sometimes even for moms.
I was not prepared for the birthday invitation my six-year-old daughter got about a month ago. I was thinking the usual bouncy house, gymnastics, bowling or pool party for the cool first graders, but then I saw the words "sleep over" and my heart sank. Decades of repressed sleep over disaster memories came flooding back. I sat back in my chair, reread the invitation and immediately wondered how and if this would work. Maybe we would be out of town, maybe my daughter wouldn’t want to go, or maybe there would be a hurricane and the whole stress-inducing, bad-childhood-memory-making day would disappear. Then I decided to let my daughter decide and put my ridiculous, overblown (because I had some excellent sleepovers) memories behind me. So I …
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
When to look the other way and let kids try their hand at fashion.
I think it is fair to say that every mom dreams of dressing up her little girls in the sea of adorable outfits clothing manufacturing dream up every year. I will be the first to admit that, while I only bought one or two little boy outfits pre-delivery, I bought several perfectly pink frilly ensembles, even though I had no idea what I was having. The good news is that I was right in my assumption that I would have a girl first. So now that the kids are getting older and their opinions are louder, when is it time to look the other way and let kids dress themselves? Judging by some of the outfits I see at drop-off, it can start as early as preschool. Luckily, at that age, pretty much anything goes in the fashion department. Little ones can …
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
With school back in swing homework can’t be far behind and creating good habits can make everyone’s life easier.
Now that I have school-age children, I feel the homework debate brewing. Some feel it takes away from the little time families seem to have with each other these days and others feel it reinforces what is taught in school. I fall somewhere in between the two. I understand some of the arguments on both sides. But for now, I am putting on a positive face for my kids and making it fun and productive. I will take my fight to the streets another time and in another article. So, how do you make homework fun and productive? 1. Stay Positive First, get rid of any of the bad homework baggage you’ve collected from your school days and start anew. We all have memories of being exhausted with pages of algebra to do and Shakespeare to read, so let all …
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
After a summer full of camp, late nights and no schedule some kids need a little convincing that back to school is cool.
I always love this time of year although I don’t tend to embrace it until a week before it arrives. Back to school means so many things and it is different for parents and for kids. So here is my kickoff to the school year with 10 reasons for parents and kids to get psyched for the first day of school. 1. You get new stuff: It doesn’t matter that it is still 90 degrees outside; new fall clothes are a must for back to school. While you are at the store might as well pick up a new backpack, lunch box and those ever important trendy sneakers. Maybe Mom will even throw in an iPad. Maybe not. And let’s be honest when have you ever gone shopping for your kids and not thrown in something for yourself? A shirt for them, a shirt for me. A backpack …
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
With all of the phases children go through, the fighting phase has to be the most frustrating.
It was bound to happen sooner or later. Maybe it was bad karma for breezing through my friends' Facebook posts with an air of superiority when they posted about their children’s endless fighting. Maybe I was just due for some “real” parenting after so many years of smooth sailing. All I know is I am now knee deep in the dreaded sibling rivalry phase—or, as I call it, “if you two don’t stop fighting I am going to _________ (insert your favorite threat here)” phase. I have no idea why I think any of my lame threats will work when they obviously haven’t in the past, but sometimes a mom gets so raging mad that she says the craziest and dumbest things. Why, just last week I unleashed one of my crazy threats to my kids and my daughter responded …
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Media is everywhere, so why not make them work for you and your kids?
“If you can’t beat them, join them,” the old saying goes, so with that in mind I have started to become a lot smarter about digital media. It dawned on me last week when I spent a week with my extended family for a beach vacation. Two teenagers were among us, and boy did they go to town on their smart phones and tablets. My kids were quick to follow suit, and it got me thinking about how I handle my kids' digital media usage. A while ago, we decided that there would be no TV during the week because, frankly, there are so many more exciting things to do—especially in the summer. I recently extended that to include screen time. No, I wasn’t the most popular person in the house that day, but it was soon forgotten, and we were on to other more…
Lollie Davis Weeks
3:10 pm on Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Pub party!? Now that's a kid birthday party I could get into! more ›